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User | Post |
Rogue Posts: 3648/11918 |
Hey teachers and fellow educators of the world! Tired of dealing with pesky, disrespectful low-account teenagers?
Try instituting the handy, dandy, sweet as candy BR Act today! It's the kid-be-gone like you've never seen--splicing, dicing, and romanticizing your useless wastes of time, money, and oxygen. Just take a class of ordinary high school students, dump them on a deserted island with weapons and various implements of torture and watch them take each other out without you having to lift a finger. It's THAT easy! It's the vacation of a lifetime. But wait, that's not all...!! Call right now and receive a notebook absolutely free. Not just any notebook--write a name it in and that person dies almost instantly!* Act now! *The human whose name is written in this note shall die. This note will not take effect unless the writer has the person's face in their mind when writing his/her name. Therefore, people sharing the same name will not be affected. If the cause of death is written within 40 seconds of writing the person's name, it will happen. If the cause of death is not specified, the subject will simply die of a heart attack. After writing the cause of death, the details of the death should be written in the next 6 minutes and 40 seconds. Void when used outside of the continental U.S. Warranty not covered by accidents or acts of shinigami. |
The Accidental Protege Posts: 2337/2641 |
*dracula is holding a bottle of sun-tan lotion*
"Try new Sunblockers Tanning Lotion! ...Vat? Vat are you lookink at me all funny for?" *reel is cut* |
Fennicy Posts: 350/546 |
*first scene there is a shot of a dog kennel in the middle of the darkest part of the woods*
Please adopt your new werewolf puppy now! They need homes! *says someone holding a small kid in their arms..then the moon starts to get full...* |
Cairoi Posts: 2567/3807 |
Seticus, stop it now.
Anyway. *scene opens with an empty white room, with a black Playstation 3 standing still* *static begins to overtake the screen, until the sight of a nail going through a fingernail appears* *An image of a woman in a painting brushing her hair* *Then a little girl with long black hair strewn over her face down to her feet stares at you* *Your Phone rings, and when you pick up, an eeiry voice says* "You will die in seven days if you do not buy a PS3* |
Bitmap Posts: 5082/7838 |
Thanks for Hijacking my thread Rauni.
*Ignoring Rauni* Advertise commercial products from famous horror movies |
Rauni Posts: 1331/1351 |
Originally posted by Thor Try having a pet lion licking it off. Or an alligator biting your dick off. Or an orycteropus afer sticked their tongue into someone's holes and ripped out their guts. Or an elephant that shit on you, enough to kill you by the weight of emorous shit and lack of oxygen. This is a totally pointless question anyway. -9349 post count to Nagis. Thing you expected to see in Sex and the City. |
The Accidental Protege Posts: 2334/2641 |
Rauni, that sounds like a perfectly acceptable pet to me
A rooster. You'll never be popular going around saying "Wanna check out my cock?". |
Rauni Posts: 1330/1351 |
Originally posted by Rogue There, it is more suitable funny. Now for the world worst pet. Any kind of pet that licked your balls. |
Fennicy Posts: 349/546 |
An elephant because they might try to sit on your lap. >> |
Bitmap Posts: 5079/7838 |
69 Post counts for Rogue.
Worlds worst pet! |
Cairoi Posts: 2565/3807 |
I had a witty response to the prompt, but really, I just Rogue to win this round.
+1 zillion posts Rogue |
Rauni Posts: 1329/1351 |
Mrs. Mickie Mouse: "You goddamn motherfucking bitch!"
Mrs. Donald Duck: "*Gasp* Fuck you, you carwash cunt! I HAD A DENTAL APPOINTMENT!" (2304 post counts for anyone know where THAT lines came from. Screw Nagis's rules, I have post counts.) |
Rogue Posts: 3645/11918 |
After Simba's winning back the Pridelands, he needed his henchmen to take care of any further insurgents while he was busy making some cubs with Nala.
Timon: What does Simba Hyena: What? Timon: What country you from? Hyena: What? Timon: What ain't no country I ever heard of! They speak English in What? Hyena: What? Timon: ENGLISH, MOTHERFUCKER! DO-YOU-SPEAK-IT? Hyena: Yes! Timon: Then you know what I'm saying! Hyena: Yes! Timon: Describe what Simba Lion King looks like! Hyena: What, I-? Timon: *pointing his gun* Say what again. SAY WHAT AGAIN. I dare you, I double dare you, motherfucker. Say what one more goddamn time. Hyena: He's a lion... Timon: Go on. Hyena: He's yellow... Timon: Does he look like a bitch? Hyena: What? *Timon shoots Hyena in shoulder* Timon: DOES HE LOOK LIKE A BITCH? Hyena: No! Timon: Then why you try to fuck him like a bitch, you slobbering mangy stupid poacher? Hyena: I didn't. Timon: Yes you did. Yes you did. You tried to fuck him. And Simba Lion King don't like to be fucked by anybody, except Mrs. Lion King. *Timon stands over the hyena* Timon: Hakuna Matata, motherfucker. *Shoots hyena* |
天国JOE Posts: 1853/2999 |
Mickey: "Sorry, Pluto. But, you're beyond saving now..." *gets gun, takes Pluto out back* |
Rauni Posts: 1328/1351 |
Mickey: "Mimmie! You fucking whore!"
Doofy: "Remember, kids, smoking cracks is good for your health." Donald: "Listen kids, I shit 304 times a day, wanna feel my shit?" Tarzan: "Me dumb fuck. I steal you." Tron: "F34R mY H4xX0r s31ll!" |
Bitmap Posts: 5078/7838 |
-502 posts to everyone.
When Disney characters talk like adults |
Rauni Posts: 1325/1351 |
Originally posted by King Cairoi Shhh... It's a secret. "Dear Diary, I kicked someone off the internet. That girl, Rauni, I hope she think the hot sex isn't over yet..." |
Cairoi Posts: 2564/3807 |
Hey, Seticus.
Anyway: "Dear Diary, I had a dream last night I was Protoman, traversing through the Valleys of the Giant Boobs, when I met the Ninja Turtles. I don't know what I ate, but that stuff is better than drugs." |
Rauni Posts: 1324/1351 |
"I watched some Games Porno today, it was mind-exciting experience that I got laid 5 times before I got to my Wii." |
Bitmap Posts: 5075/7838 |
456 post counts for Rogue
+4 posts a day for Thor if he ever drinks the soda. Things that are written in Xeo's Diary |
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